PASSING ON MY ACTUAL YOUTH IS SO IMPORTANT 2025

Hi readers I would urge you to be of a certain age or an adult as there’s topics in this article meant for my girls / daughters reading but will obviously be published way before then. So my actual story and why passing on physical objects is so important ! My father left me scars physically abused scars and mental health issues I’ll never get over so being not just better than him but totally unlike anything he could be apart from the obvious which is the looks.

I have some early memories. I remember my sister taking me to nursery and I was crying. I’m not sure why she left me a packet of biscuits and some sweets as I was way too young to eat them and this was at a school called Morley Street I think we live in town at the time.  After moving from Whitehall to the Lewis Road and then onto the destructive life draining and memory shattering estate called Moulsecoomb! This is stay as far as I can remember as in my actual story was okay until a drug dealing family was put onto our estate or they managed to get housing with a member of the family and this was the beginning of the end to my youth.

It’s okay being one of 14 children which could’ve been as high as 18 if only siblings had survived but yes, I am one of the free actual children with my mum and dad whom  had relationships before meeting each other, hence the look of my Victorian punished siblings and size wise too ! Imagine Gloria actually having 16-18 children that would take a toll on the body. Unfortunately for us my mother realise the more children she had the more money Social Security would pay out.

Coming from the family background that I did obviously there was no one to teach my peers so hearing of the trauma that my cousins went through one by one they either went into the care of the state or like my mother’s idea for more cigarettes and that was too adopt or foster and my two younger cousins. If I remember rightly we has lost my sister. My elder sister on my mother side was still living at home with her eldest son who threw the law was even with social services us or taken by the law to pay for his crimes.

Many almost will think what the hell as there’s got to do with Bulldogs and to be honest with you and I don’t wish to be rude here I am trying to stay as professional as possible but I do not care not even the stigma if I can write down a bona fide a-to-Z of my life then why shouldn’t it be in my backstory and a recent police investigation? With me as the adult victim a perfect reason for explaining where I came from and why passing on is so important especially to me.

Myself and my wife fight and she says it’s because I have a bigger IQ I tend to know more than her that’s not true but what is true is how we embrace and emulate our pasts this is where the synapsis is needed if you’re going to understand that we all become just like our parents we hear comments and quotes coming out of our mouths just like our parents and it is down to our own growth and the way we see the world as to how we wish to best emulate as you know it can be The biggest form of flattery it can also turn you and without noticing you are in your fault and the things that are coming out your mouth your parents used to say.

Also by passing on as it’s important is the story of my life not just the collection that I have built up over the last 13 years yes collectible log.com is a world class English bulldog memorabilia collection but there is a mind behind the project that must’ve felt somehow or somewhere down the line That there will be or has importances that I feel tells the English bulldog history and we are in 2025 where the XL bully is the breed of choice for the news to pick on yet saying that it is the beginning of February and one story that was on the news was but Rottweilers

That takes me on perfectly to my mother. This lady must’ve had it so hard and tough in her life that she felt the life we lead was idyllic getting with a man over 20 years older that works and makes his own money is not a Lady that is on the up but one that has learnt how best to survive and unfortunately her way was the benefits baby way yes that’s correct what I’m passing on and why it is important goes to show that in 2025 when you watch the news you will see other actual stories but there are no happy endings just deceased little ones and jailed parents.

My life was a constant fight either with my parents my siblings the bullies the drug dealer kids basically anyone that’s so my family as “aborigines“ this was a nickname given to us by the family that lived next door the family that could afford class a drugs, beautiful cars holidays Late night parties and the confidence to tell me to F off when I was sent round by my father to tell this selection of adults ranging from drunk to completely Nutted on whatever please keep the noise down. I think the least I ever got was a push off the steps. I don’t remember once actually coming back round after being knocked out. One of their guests one night.

Can I just point out if you think I am embarrassed or feel I have contravened my self to much and the mental health stigma? Then unfortunately wrong it’s others that need to learn not just from me but this actual story that I feel is important I’m passing it on. The TV shows to my Dismay, disgrace and disbelief. It’s 2025 and I am watching a father on the news explaining to the court that he was just played fighting when he stabbed his daughter whilst drunk.

This brought back the memories of Sunday dinners if we were lucky enough to get one my so-called loving father would wait until myself and my younger brother the two most active brothers at home at the time I have finished doing the chores as we were so scared if we did not do them right we knew we were in for a Good hiding my dad never drank he never touched drugs but one thing he did and that was what his own children fight each other with Sunday dinner carving knives for his pleasure.

My eyes closed and when I look back over 30 whole years I can see my younger brother as wound up as I am by our father swinging serrated and pointed carving knife’s that would normally be in the drawer these would be coming at me like some sort of arranged film sequence. I think my brother caught me a couple of times and being older and responsible. I knew this was wrong. The most I could do protect myself and my body and sometimes this wasn’t enough, but how could I blame someone younger than me and made to do it.

Bright eye article writers and bloggers will notice that I am trying to right now, whilst reminiscing and keeping my frustrations and emotions at a level where I can write this without having to take a mild overdose. Please note this is a term phrase for someone that has taken One more than their prescribed dosage. Please consult a doctor or phone 999 or 911 or any emergency number that your country uses if any kind of overdose is taken you can actually create toxic chemicals inside the body which will need specialist and hospital treatment so always stay within the limit your doctor prescribed please

I’m hoping by sharing this content about my life about mental health and about what you can do yourself and what you can’t do get notice for wise it takes a brave man or women to sit down and state some of the things that I have it’s unfair that 46 years later I am seeing what happened to me happened to other people other children it’s horrible seeing kids that have so much promise and so much life ahead of them their lives completely wiped out due to a complete misunderstanding miseducation and some really really sick people out there they only care about How they feel or think,

For some reason there’s a human race no matter what we pass down it is never the right thing we have conflicts and wars after World War II and the nuclear bomb we seem to have more people hurting themselves with drugs and drink knowing what it does and their children have to put up with the abuse pain her shame guilt and all the other emotions associated with being young and being battered. I thought what happened to me was something that happened in the 70s or 80s not something that is still going on in 2025.

Social services in this country has not played its part now for over 30 years it’s either we take the children away or you keep your children with you and there is no proof of hell we want to see you raising them as long as there are no bruises when we come round for a visit, then it’s okay of course I am being sarcastically cynical social services let me down and if I had stayed with them at the age of eight so much of my life that was either horrible or worse than that created turmoil would not have happened. I would’ve been in a respectable family with a good chance on life and not just this statistic. I knew I was always going to be well sitting in school assembly. Call it hindsight.

Not being the only victim of their parents during the 80s I know for a fact that there were others. I even have friends whose parents had better excuses like alcohol misuse or drug misuse to say why they were misunderstandly  hurting their children. this wasn’t the case with me and my siblings my mother would be the devil if she did not have cigarettes. This was what she called her vice, my older brothers and sisters didn’t get out of having to go picking up butts for my mum to smoke. I’m guessing because I did not have to do this. My father made enough money whilst working for my mum to smoke all she wanted.

You most probably all think that it would’ve been my father that created the first breakage of my body, but in fact it was my mother. My friend had got into a fight and trampled all over someone’s bicycle. The person is Mum came to my house and blamed me. I do not think I even got a chance to state what went on before my mother told me that I was back chatting and a big fat hand switched around and like out of Rocky my saliva came out of my mouth with the very first adult tooth I was to loose. I didn’t even get a chance to tell the truth before I was told if I lied that’s the kind of punishment I would get.

My father was definitely more sadistic. He had these tools of torture as I called them between the gas pipe and the fireplace. in the front room it’s a shame I am not into S and M has been locked in my bedroom the bathroom the garden even tied to the bed for my dad would tie one of these bandages from the door handle round to The stair banister we would have to wee and poo in a bucket and if you can imagine myself and my brother let out birds accidentally one day and after a battering that felt like it was half an hour we were banished to our room for the whole of the summer holidays!

This must’ve been the only summer holiday time not at school where I wasn’t beaten up consistently because I was grounded to my bedroom but this only works until my parents want either the church the chores or something from the shop this could be cigarettes from the newsagents or a long walk to the chemist to get my father‘s treatment stuff for his leg ulcers and other injuries that he suffered from, I think one part of the emulation that I do keep is the fact that I did not go out. I am not agoraphobic. I am not. scared of people I just prefer not to go outside whether my mum was one of the above or just lazy still has to be proved.  Cannot hear that.

Just like most of it, people, my age in this situation usually end up in foster care or supported lodgings I was given the choice of two households. One was a complete antique shop and the other a two up two down with swimming pool in the back garden and two Alsatian dogs called Jessica and Shika Jesus Christ or as I called him Steve my social worker (he looked just like Jesus ) gave me the two choices and of course I’m going to take the one that has dogs.

I lived with this lady and her family for over three years. This is when social services start to palm you off. Say you have a two week life lesson in a flat above an office and then you’re given some money and a small place to live and that is it that is your life with social services over it only continues if you are long-term disabled mentally ill unable to look after yourself or need supervised living conditions.

Numerous jobs numerous places to live after social services was the norm. This was until a group of drug dealing idiots thought that I took Their stash ! These so called friends. Saw the gullibility in me and it was me that actually paid for Them to go and pick up all I remember from that evening is a machete and hiding behind the bins at Saint Peters Church in Brighton. I remember them all running past. and as I run back home all the way back to where my parents lives the manic disaster didn’t stop there some Hench bloke slowed me down. As I got nearer to the estate.

This fella was definitely not after the time he tried to urge me to go back to his home and when his hands touched the back of my shorts that’s when I started running and running and running until I got to my brothers home he had no reputation for himself, but I knew he would stick up for me, long story short here I lost out on a really nice bed located bang smack in the middle of Brighton and my girlfriend at the time love the location so much she nearly moved in.

This part reminds me of my sibling. That is my next brother up. He states that I am bragging when I talk about my bulldog collection or  my metal portfolio. basically gets annoyed when I talk about what I’ve done so far for my daughters and what I will be passing on unlike my other brothers that I’ve taken the law on and lost. I have been sensible enough to learn by their mistakes. this means I have never seen a jail sentence even if I have come close to being in custody a couple of times.

I have a collection of English bulldog and takes a memorabilia. I don’t think The collection would be the same if it was in the other breed i’m also sure that OCD and other factors played apart in me creating what could be the worlds largest English bulldog research and historical objects that are bulldog themed especially English bulldog because that is all I have collected but I have also collected 13 years of research and knowledge which now transforms what was a teeny weenie Collectibles project into what is now once step away from being a national museum that’s correct a national museum.

My beliefs are a mixture of my own reality. How I see life and how I have read life up until now. Just like me when I was four years old I don’t think English Bulldogs are popular enough to be wanted, especially to the point where a museum with bricks and  mortar has been created. or was already there in the first place but to have a bulldog museum in the UK is that a reality or yet again? A statistic like most of the things that life makes me see?i  Did sometimes wish things were grey instead of instead of of black and white

What happened that day at the age of 24 to take my right away to work? Was the beginning of the end of any positive thoughts I had going forward a so called friend noted one evening and to our dismay and surprise was basically turning a home visit into a home invasion. I was smacked around the head twice with a moon shapes camping spin. These are usually used by students and because of the shape really do pack a punch when I’ve got in the way of him snatching the phone from my wife that’s when I noticed something shiny hanging from my chest very fortunate to me it was the right hand side. It just missed my lung but did have me in hospital for a very long time.

Yes, you hear me. That’s correct dad power, if you’re not a parent I don’t think you’ll understand this feeling at the moment but when you have a child, your body becomes invincible because you will put your body in front of anything and anybody to keep your children safe, this totally changed me as a person I can’t say I did not let it affect me because it’s been affecting me ever since, and if you want the definition of ironic my daughter is dating a member of a family that decades ago helped ruin my life. He is obviously much younger and not part of that but isn’t that such a coincidence?

The downside is the constant worry especially as they get older and introduced to other people with the same brain balance they pick out and choose who they wanna hang around with sometimes for the better sometimes not and with our daughter it was very much not but now she is older she is more settled has a full  time job she lives with her partner and they have been going steady now for quite awhile he is a bit of a beefcake but his muscles are nothing compared to the power that you get from that power it is unbridled invincibility well I hope so anyway just in case my girls getting into trouble one day.

Our eldest daughter turned 22 this year and our little one is 5 so you see the big differences not only age so autism is siennas super power apart from TV being to addictive her character and personality is beyond compare she has sarcasm and a joy sense of humour and at that age it is very funny and amusing. I am sure that she will grow out of this well I am hoping so because she cannot get away with telling anyone that she needs to lose weight for the next 20 years., our oldest is more chilled out until something goes wrong. It’s normally a bill or her phone and yes, it ends up costing dad one way or another.

So you see I have added the sections to the website the other not just because of the hobbies or the experiences or why passing on is so important, losing their Nan last year and their grandad the year before only leaves my mum left and my girls are estranged from my mother to the point we spent extra money every year that we did not or could not afford on extra presents saying that they were from Nan when in fact myself and my wife had brought them giving the impression my mum was thinking of her grandchildren at Christmas when in fact the only person that got over attention was my youngest brother sadly at the age of 30 something

I first started getting the idea to catalogue everything when I once asked my wife how much she thought my English bulldog collection was worth when she quoted “£5000“. I was just that little bit flabbergasted I was pretty much OMG I need to do something about this Asap. The website combines with a physical catalogue gives a rough estimate as to how much HP should or maybe be worth if ever sold.

Doing my homework with due diligence, I have got the interest of Sotheby’s for those that do not know it is one of the most procedures auction houses in the world and has sold some of the worlds most prices, artefacts, antiques and Collectibles from stars and celebrities to private sellers and the common market, although breed specific Sotheby’s saw the quality and quantity they explained that I would have to send an examples of the collection so that they can see what they are dealing with for example age price even the selling will take 4 weekends.

So passing on is important to me not just because I just basically slagged off my parents to create an article I’m hoping my kids see one day to understand why they didn’t have a relationship with their grandparents damn I couldn’t care less if I lost respect from anyone for that, after years of understanding my own mind and my father‘s passed, I finally went up to the crematorium and I forgave him, my father was born in 1928. He was a harvest boy during the war and continued in the farming industry until he could no longer farm. He then became caretaker of the university on Lewis Road and that’s when I think he met my mum.

She would’ve given him the idea that it would be easier to not work and collect child support instead but my dad was a grafter even though he was a complete Victorian era nutter. Or See you next Tuesday.! it took years and years of being a dad myself to understand what you do and what you don’t do I realise he did not have much tutoring in these department so finding it easier to forgive him came with the calling of time

Why dad and not mum, here’s whether to spouses differ, my mum should’ve got her kids got off the estate that was slowly put in the family down and got away from my father until he was fully capable of being a dad, instead of that she did the complete opposite. We grew up on a gruesome if they had no chance with school and he got to the point where I put myself in care at the age of 14. my parents were not from the normal so if I was not going to school at 14, they wanted me working full-time. This and an attempt at having a jam sandwich is what pushed my dad over the edge. He grabbed me by my hair and just kick me out the front door telling me if I wanted to eat I had to earn it.

Hopefully my younger one has a decent sense of understanding as well as reading and writing not only to see what happened to or read about what happened to her dad but to also see the good that he did from the evil that he was dish out, my girls should feel proud of their dad. He did not emulate his father. He has never hit his children and has only ever raise his voice twice with the eldest. The youngest is so cute and adorable. She doesn’t need shouting at ever.

Bulldogs antiques and dust definitely I’m not what my eldest daughter is into and she would be like her mother and want to sell the collection but even though my little girl is only five I know that she would want my collection as is ! This is evident by the little plastic containers that are up by the TV at all of her favourite Collectibles are in although I did not collect Mario or PJ Masks it is evident that we both have something very much in common

What would be great is back in for investment? Someone who’s willing to put money forward and create the backbone of what will be amuseum and gallery, unfortunately for most this normally happens when you have passed away but I am hoping that I can reach my goals before this happens. There are only a few true English braids going back over the centuries and whether we like it or not the bulldog breed in its various forms is one of them I could never afford to collect all the different bulldogs so the English bulldog and my favourite is the one you will find all over this website.

I’m thinking that the one good thing about Collectibulldogs is longevity originality and the fact that we may be one of the only websites that artificial intelligence has to come to emulate instead of just emulating off the back of the algorithm. I have tried this. I have asked AI Gemini from Google to Emulate a bulldog collection. It looks nothing like the pictures that you see or the videos that you muse when I post.

I’m not actually sure what I can ask my new host for it does seem JK for collectibulldogs.com to be my greatest over to a fantastic professional server with all the jogging words you can think of and all the power necessary to run a radio station let alone my little website I’m thinking of introducing an avatar to talk about the pieces in the collection and I’m also thinking about incorporating virtual reality.

Before any of this I’m fighting the ATS it seems that I keep getting discharged from the after treatment service or therapy every time I put in an email stating that my care plan is basically not going to plan. This is seen as complaining and as they do not want blemishes on the records or it’s because of the government’s capability back to work taking money off the disabled a couple of years earlier is the only way any chance I can get The economy growing because as in a new runway Heathrow will not be done until 2040 when I could even have my own museum by Then

My belief is that targets have been sent out to the different department and they are discharging the easiest or most  gullible people or in my case people that complain but I am fighting this I am taking the after treatment service and the Lighthouse therapy Centre to court I could leave a list of all the things that have gone wrong since me my last CPN and maybe I might write it down in another blog sometime, but until then, I have been writing my statement for the solicitor. I think it’s unfair to not just get second right health care but to during a very difficult time is very neglectful and dangerous in my life.

I’m going to finish this last paragraph by stating do your best if you end up in love and having children or just having children and not being in love except for your little ones never hit them and only raise your voice to bring the temperature of the room back down, never use it for anger and I promise you You will have lovely children who grow up to respect not just mum and dad but the life created for them and everything that is done for Them my eldest is 23 next year and still gets money for her birthday and Christmas! This isn’t me moaning of course I’m usually with no funds from September too February so that’s okay and then I get the collection for the rest of the year keeping collectibulldogs.com the worlds number one the world only and the work of this bragging, little genius.. please remember if you are not on any of the social media apps then our love spread out to you like it does all our followers and people that show interest in my English bulldog correction my backstory and what I’m doing for my girls now so they can have a better future tomorrow.

please remember that you can use www.collectibulldogs.co.uk as well as www.collectibulldogs.com these are no follow links I’m not passing on the links because your already here. Please find links in the article it’s up to you where you want to go I’m just passing on

Magical thinking in Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD) is the belief that thoughts, words, actions, or wishes can cause real-world events. People with OCD who experience magical thinking may feel like they can prevent bad things from happening, or that they are responsible for the Safety of others 

https://adaa.org/learn-from-us/from-the-experts/blog-posts/consumer/role-magical-thinking-ocd for those that are interested in the subject matter and those that have not heard of OCD magical thinking the term most used is just above and I have provided a link to a reputable website that can give you more information.